What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
Randomize