wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
50% drunk capacity currently
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Randomize
