Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
