sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
Houston, we have a blender
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
Drake has all the answers
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
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