Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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