Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
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