so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Randomize
