She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
