how can u be prego again
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
If you think me talking about that hot guy accepting my LinkedIn request is pornographic, I’m not sure how you’re gonna feel when I tell you I fucked a stranger on a park bench last weekend
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