Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
Your cock deserves a montage
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
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