I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Randomize
