i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
So much Jack, so little girl.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize