Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
Randomize
