So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Randomize
