I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
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