Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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