11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
Midget sex pt 2 tonight
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize
