he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
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