Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Randomize
