Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Randomize
