I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
This show inspires me to have sex in space
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
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