do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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