dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
You made out with two different species that night
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
