office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
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