I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Randomize
