Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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