do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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