Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize
