I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize
