K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Randomize
