I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
