Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
Randomize
