...so i touched it.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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