Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
im drinking this country out of the recession.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
Randomize
