K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Randomize
