You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Randomize
