their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize
