It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
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