I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize