Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
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