Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
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