yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Randomize
