Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
i need some magic done to my vagina
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
Randomize
