it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
Randomize
