my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
