he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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