Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize