I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
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