she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
Randomize
