He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
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