I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
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