halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
Randomize
